Author: The Dopest Blogger Alive

Is Dancing in the Club With Another While in a Relationship Acceptable?

Personally I think that people make too much of a deal about this issue. I wouldn’t care if my man was dancing with another girl in the club unless he took things WAY TOO FAR. I would be upset if he was groping the girl in a manner that he was about to have sex with her or if his tongue was down her throat! (in that case we would be discussing the terms of our relationship) If the girl was one of my haters or someone who he knew was trying to interfere with our relationship, then that would be a problem also. But getting twerked on by an innocent girl in the club wouldn’t phase me.

In high school, I dated this boy who absolutely hated the fact of me dancing with other boys at a party. He was never at those parties but would ask during our phone conversations afterwards did I dance with someone. Everyone who knows me can attest to the fact that I love to dance (particularly twerk) at parties. I have never been unfaithful in any relationship and I wasn’t exchanging numbers with the people I was dancing with. A dance normally occurs 60 seconds or less. Asking questions of that nature shows that he was insecure about himself; maybe he thought I would end up with them instead of him. When I asked him what the big deal about me dancing with others were, he mentioned the following:

  • Your butt is too close to another man’s penis
  • Dancing is a similar motion to sex
  • That man will know think that he can have you
  • It’s disrespectful when you are in a relationship

My response to him was:

  • Why are you breaking this subject down so deeply?
  • Dancing is not close to sex at all considering no one is being penetrated and all clothing items are intact.
  • it shouldn’t matter if another man want me or think he can have me because clearly I’m with you
  • It shouldn’t be looked at disrespect when I’m not flaunting in your face, I’m not leading him on, exchanging numbers, or putting myself in a situation to come off as a single girl.

This situation with my ex happened in high school and ironically we both still have the different views on this issue! (good thing we are not still together lol) Things have changed since high school and when I go out now it’s rare that I will twerk on another. However, if I happen to do so I think it will be silly for my man to take it to the heart. If my man went on a trip to Las Vegas I wouldn’t dare ask him if he have partaken in getting twerked on. If that is my biggest worry then clearly I have trust issues and shouldn’t be in a relationship anyways.

Now I am aware that there are levels to this! If your mate is portraying as a single individual in the club then that’s a problem. But if they were only partaking in an innocent dance why cry over it. Here are some ways that a dance wouldn’t be considered innocent:

  •  If they are prolonging the dance and transforming it into something deeper that you should only be doing with your mate.
  • If they are grabbing body parts and whispering sexual statements in the other’s ear.
  • If they are making plans to meet up with this individual after the club is over.
  • If when asked about being in a relationship they don’t answer truthfully.

Okay I have asked others their opinion on this subject and there were some who agreed with my stance and there were others who disagreed. Please comment your view on the acceptance of dancing in the club with another below. If you disagree, answer the following questions for me: Would you end the term of your relationship just on a single dance alone? Do you consider it cheating if your partner dances with another? If your partner was not at the same club as you would you dance with someone else? If you went on a  turn-up trip with your girls/boys and danced with another would you want your partner to take this subject so deeply?

The Infamous Durdy Costello

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When you first hear a song and its jammin what do you do? Well, the first thing I do is research the artist and the producer. The first element that draws me into listening to a new song is how well the beat is mixed. Of course after that, it is the artist’s job to keep my attention with some well intriguing lyrics. Without great producers, music would be lacking an important element.

I became aware of the 27 year old Justin Allison better known as Durdy Costello, by listening to the music from some of the previous artists that I’ve interviewed. It is likely that, most Jackson-based music or artists have at least some connection with the infamous Durdy Costello. Some of the artists he has mixed for includes Doe Hicks, Luck, Young Vegas, J.Skyy, Silas, 4th Quarter, etc.   However, he is not only known locally or state wide. The song “One Time” that he  produced for the artist Doe Hicks premiered on World Star Hip Hop. Durdy Costello, is not new to the music scene. He began in high school making beats and was the dj for most of the school dances.  He currently is one of the DJs for freelons, mbar, and Houston Bar and Grill. Watch the interview I did with him below and comment your thoughts 🙂

Follow: Instagram/Twitter = @DurdyCostello

Contact : [email protected] or go to www.durdycostello.com

durdy costello

What is Your Deal Breaker in a Relationship?

What is your deal breaker in a relationship? A deal breaker is the thing or things that you will not stand for in a relationship. If those certain things occurred you would end the relationship immediately. I have a couple of deal breakers including cheating and continuous lying. However, the number one deal breaker for me is when a man talks about what he is going to do instead of actually producing actions. That is something that would cause me to stop talking to someone immediately lol! I had the opportunity to ask some people in the community of Jackson, Mississippi  about their personal deal breakers. Watch the video below and comment and tell us your deal breaker in a relationship!!!

 

 

 

Sachmoe Phlanagan a Musician Not a Rapper

  

@SACHMOEPHLANAGAN
@SACHMOEPHLANAGAN

 A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to sit down and speak with Sachmoe Phlanagan formely known as Slim Pickett. Sachmoe is a Jackson, Mississippi native who’ve had an interest in music his entire life. Sachmoe seperates himself from other rappers by being a muscian. He grew up listening to the greats including Louis Arm Strong, Lionel Richie, Gladys Knight, etc… and he also played the chello for 12 years. The single “Out the Mud” from his well known mixtape “Black Magic” has created a lot of buzz around the city. I can’t pinpoint where I first heard that song but I found myself already knowing the lyrics to the chrous before I began my research on Sachmoe.  He is currently working on his album “Distinguished” which is due to drop sometime later this year.

Some of Sachmoe’s releases include:

  • “Workshop” ft. Young Dolph (September 2013)
  • “Is It True” (September 2013)
  • Mixtape “Blowin Like Sachmoe” (October 2013)
  • Mixtape “4 Promo Use Only” (October 2013)
  • Mixtape “Black Magic” (January 2014)
  • Mixtape “Black Magic Reloaded” (July 2014)

Sachmoe will be opening up for Rick Ross, Rich Homie Quan, and Young Thug this Saturday for  the Kings Of The South Concert at the Mississippi Colisuem in Jackson Mississippi. Come out and support! I love seeing people receive opportunities like this and things will only expand if he continues to release a powerful  work ethic 🙂

 In this interview I got real deep and personal with Sachmoe asking him questions that every woman desires to know about men. What prevents men from expression? Watch the interview below and express your thoughts!!

Check out Sachmoe below on You Tube, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and on his personal website: Sachmoe Phlanagan – YouTube Sachmoe Phlanagan | Facebook  Black Magic | Sachmoe Phlanagan Sachmoe (fogsachmoe) on Twitter Instagram @Sachmoephlanagan

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Right Wrong or Justified Who Are You to Judge?

mikeI’m sure that many of you are aware of the latest tragic event that occurred in St. Louis this past weekend. For those who aren’t aware here are the facts! On August 11, 2014 an unarmed African American teenager by the name of Michael Brown was shot and killed by a Ferguson County Police officer. Brown’s body was left to bleed out in the street for hours before the authorities relocated his body. The Ferguson authorities placed the body in an unrecognizable vehicle and Lesley Mc Spadden mother of Michael Brown was denied the option to identify her son’s body. The Ferguson Police Department refuses to reveal the name of the white police officer that shot and killed Michael Brown. They did state that this particular officer is on paid administrative leave until further notice.

There have been many different stories that led up to the killing of Michael Brown. Some include that he stole something from the Quick Trip gas station and that’s why he was running away from the police. A quick trip employee later stated that Brown did not steal anything. There have been multiple eye witnesses stating that Brown was minding his business and the unknown police officer initiated physical harm on the unarmed teenager. Regardless of what exactly occurred, this death doesn’t make sense at all. How does an unarmed teenager get shot multiple times? Can the officer state that he was threatened so much by an unarmed black teenager to shoot him at least 9 times?  The Ferguson police department has made some vague statements on what they want us to believe about the story but they are not really saying much at this time. It is apparent that the police is hiding information and buying time to get their story correct about what really happened.

The death of Michael Brown opened a lot of hurtful wounds for numerous people. Michael Brown is a reminder of all the people that have been mistreated by government officials. These situations are and have been happening for quite some time now across the globe and it is time for a change! A similar situation happened to me and my family so I can relate to the hurt that African Americans are feeling at this time.  We feel ignored and we are tired of certain people getting away with things and thinking they are above the law. 

There are a lot of issues that I could discuss about this matter. However, for this particular post my focus is on people, specifically African Americans who are judging others for their personal response to the intentional death of Michael Brown. There have been peaceful protesters and there are also those who are expressing themselves by rioting. I know there may be opportunist that are taking this time to use rioting and looting for thier own benefit. These are the people who’ve already initiated a plan to steal before Brown was executed but that is not the case for everyone. Violence and acting in an outraged manner is a natural reaction to a situation where someone close to you were taken away from you by force.  Many are asking well what about the black on black crimes. “Blacks kill and commit crimes against each other every day”. I will respond by saying this, black on black crime is an issue as well as many other things but clearly it is not an issue in this case. I feel that people who are mentioning black on black crimes are attempting to take the focus off the real issue at hand. We have a far way to go as a culture and we will keep building but the real issue at hand is racism against blacks. People are also saying “Looting and damaging property won’t bring Michael back”. It is clear that looting and damaging property won’t bring a person who was executed back to life. But sitting back and allowing history to repeat itself won’t do the trick either.

There have always been people who deal with situations in a different manner. For example Martin Luther King Jr. was one who represented peace and turning the other cheek. Whereas Malcolm X was one who believed in retaliation against whoever were attempting to continue the control against our people. There has always been different ways to handle things but either method isn’t necessary wrong or right. When the situation happened to me I did not take a violent route but that doesn’t mean that I did not want to or that I’m not capable of doing such. Before you guys judge the reactions of those in St. Louis put yourself in their shoes, pray for peace and guidance for everyone, and do your research on how many unarmed African Americans are being gunned downed by white police officers. This situation seems to be common but then research how many white police officers gun down and kill unarmed whites.

People are tired of being oppressed and tired of their voices being unheard. You never know what you are capable of until something happens that directly effects you. So whether you think their actions are right, wrong, or justified, who are you to judge?